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Faith of a Mustard Seed

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Faith of a Mustard Seed Every day presents a new challenge to overcome. There were times when I couldn’t bring myself to leave my comfort zone—my bed, my car, my television, my music, or even a conversation with my sister. The thought of stepping out filled me with such anxiety that I almost didn’t. Yet, an inner strength I had never recognized before began to emerge, gently urging me forward. Before my recovery, I often found myself paralyzed by physical pain or anxiety. At times, anxiety masqueraded as excitement for upcoming opportunities, but that excitement would spiral. I’d stay awake all night with anticipation, only to be too exhausted the next day to act on those opportunities. It felt strange to want something so deeply and yet sabotage it unintentionally.  While some find their drive in their children or the pursuit of money, I struggled to pinpoint mine. Over time, I began to recognize a steady, calming presence within me—a wave of motivation that guided me. It was this...
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Reassessing Love & Relationship Structures

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  Reassessing Love & Relationship Structures The dating game has changed. Back in the day, relationships followed a clearer script. You met someone through school, work, church, family, or mutual friends. You dated, married, had children, built a household, and stayed together. That was considered stability. But stability did not always mean love. Marriage also provided financial security, social status, children, property, and access—especially for women, whose economic independence was far more limited. In 1950, the median age of first marriage was only 22.8 for men and 20.3 for women. By 2021, 25% of 40-year-olds in the United States had never married. That says a lot about how much has changed. And before we romanticize the “good old days,” people were cheating, living double lives, staying in abusive marriages, and marrying for survival long before dating apps existed. People did not invent adultery after Tinder. We just gained screenshots. Today, marriage is optional. Chi...
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Fueling Dissatisfaction: Recognizing Contempt

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Fueling Dissatisfaction What is your comfort zone and what is trapping you inside of it? I'm combating my contempt with challenging myself. In peer work, we call this “Fueling Dissatisfaction”. Fueling Dissatisfaction is the process of actively focusing on or contributing to the gap between one's current reality and their expectations or desires. This is also known as…putting a fire under yo ass. It reminds me of a quote, “Shit don't change til you get up and wash yo ass!” A real life example for Fueling Dissatisfaction for me is how I am stepping up to new challenges everyday because I need to prepare myself for the unknown. I have realized that when I follow Murphy’s Law, “Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong!”, I become more apt to push myself the extra mile. Being prepared trumps being exhausted (EVERYTIME). Some people (most unfamiliar with the quote), view this as pessimism (negative thinking). It is actually Realism. Idealists are optimistic and risk-takers, whi...
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Obstacles

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In life, obstacles always stand between us and our goals. If it’s an iceberg, start at the bottom. If it’s a boulder, chip away at it. If it’s a mountain, go around it. If it’s a door, open it. And if it’s locked, make a key. If it’s an ocean between where you are and where you want to be, grab a life jacket. Progress is a process. Even baby steps will get you places. At the beginning of the journey, there are no rewards—but the results will unveil themselves at the end. Like a planted seed, growth takes time. Nature isn’t formed overnight; it requires sunlight, water, and care. Obstacles, too, are part of that natural process, shaping us as we navigate them. With patience and persistence, what seems insurmountable today can transform into the foundation of tomorrow's success. © 2025 Priestess Ziona. All Rights Reserved.
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The Value Within

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I have little patience for those who assume they know me, especially when their judgments rest on stereotypes about my identity as a young, Black, queer woman with Mental Health. People often try to box us into narrow categories conjured from ignorance. If human nature is inherently hypocritical, we must accept that no one can fully understand us, not even ourselves. We are always evolving, always growing. So why should we allow others to define us? Our worth should never be tied to shallow societal standards or material possessions. True value is not found in what we own but in who we are. It’s not about how much money you have or what you can bring to the table. Your value isn’t determined by the brand of shoes you wear or the designer bags you own. When you attach a "value" to who you are, you risk becoming just another commodity to be bought and sold. The things that truly matter (authenticity, integrity, love) cannot be purchased. Yet, too often, we live in a world that ...
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Living With Chronic Pain: Learning My Body, Protecting My Organs, and Finding Relief Where I Can 🌿

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I’ve been battling chronic pain for 16 years. Long enough to know that pain isn’t just physical, it’s emotional, mental, and deeply personal. For a long time, one of the biggest lifelines in my pain management was weekly massage therapy. For 16 months straight, my health insurance covered it as a medical incentive, and honestly, it helped keep me functional. When that incentive was discontinued, everything shifted. My doctors and I fought hard to get it reinstated because pharmaceutical technology wasn't doing much for me and in some cases, was creating more risk than relief. When the massage therapy stopped, my pain intensified, my sleep deteriorated, and eventually, I spiraled into a deep depression. I was out of work for a month just trying to recover and regain some sense of strength. That period was heavy… and humbling. After seeing three different pain specialists, I was officially diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. Fibromyalgia is a chronic condition characterized by widespread mu...
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“Wallflower Child”

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  I liked to think of myself as a “WallFlower Child”. A “WallFlower Child” is a person that was desensitized by exposure to adult activities. This is why people do not curse, smoke, or use adult language around children and we tell them “Stay out of grown folks' business” “Stay in a child’s place” “Don’t grow up too fast” However taboo and rare, I was exposed to tons of adult content and experiences at an early age. I was always curious and observant in these adult settings. I was raised by a village of drug-abusing addicts, alcoholics, drug dealers, gang members, convicts, pimps, prostitutes, mental illness, and violence. We called it “THE FAMILY CURSE” I also identify as an empath. When I was seeing drugs on the tables, drunken fights, self-harm, and other dysfunctions by my elders, I absorbed all this energy and could FEEL and WITNESS to the emotions, the power, and the weakness in the environment. I felt the pain, anger, resentment, sorrows, grief, and stress of the adults arou...
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